It sounds intimidating I know, but the more you hide this debt the bigger it will become and the worse you will feel about it, so I really encourage you to be open and honest – I promise you will feel relieved as soon as you do. .
Do not allow financial independence
Micromanagement is a major mood killer and it’s important to remember that while we must strive to be smart with our money so that we can prepare for financial freedom, we also need to enjoy our lives and we having fun with our money along the way. I often see couples in distress because they haven’t been able to let go of their complete financial control, and I understand that if you’ve worked really hard for your money, it’s understandable that you want to make sure you don’t. are not. waste it.
However, when you have made the decision to merge the finances, we have to adjust our thinking from ‘it’s my money’ to ‘it’s our money âand give ourselves the space to spend without feeling the suffocating impression that someone is watching over our shoulder and watching every penny. If you feel like your partner is overspending while exercising extreme spending discipline, don’t be afraid to talk to them nicely, remind them of your shared goals, and just keep this line of communication open!
But please note that if your partner crosses the line by restricting your access to your bank accounts and monitoring how you spend every penny then it becomes territory of financial abuse and if you are in that position then I urge you to contact 1800RESPECT.
Victoria Devine is an award-winning financial advisor and founder of the She’s on the Money podcast. His new book She’s on the money (published by Penguin Random House Australia) is available from June 16.